How to be Sumstar cool
Hello friends. I am afraid that I have now hijacked this blog in the most aggressive way possible (Sumona lent me her laptop). Thus, I thought it would be appropriate to write a blog post based on the lifelong question - 'how can I be cool?' SUMONA STYLE.
Here are a few tips and tricks that I have learnt during my close observation and study of this mysterious creature's behaviour and mannerisms:
- Poker face. ALL the time. Never give away the fact that when someone's talking you're actually plotting to kill them; that would be totally uncool and very not Sumona. Maintain the game face. Hate inwardly. It will all reveal itself eventually.
-HATE cats. Don't follow the trend of the 'Crazy Cat Lady' - it's totally Un-Sumstar. She hates them. Abhors them. You want to really be cool? Abolish the kitties.
-Have all the latest Bollywood tracks on your iPod. It's SO important to keep up to date on the latest singles to hit the taxi cabs so you're prepared on your mental nights out.
- Fan girl over Channing Tatum. Big time. And his neck that is the same circumference as a car tyre. So hot.
- Have toothbrushes in your kitchen. No- I'm being serious. The whole dental kit set right next to the bread and the cups, It's totally cool to do this. If you want to be Sumona.
- Casually have used ear buds at the top of the fridge. Adds to the element of surprise. Totally Sumstar cool.
- Linkin Park 4 EVER!"1!!!! OMG you don't even know. To truly capture the concept of being 'Sumstar Cool' you have got to fan girl over Minutes to Midnight. Also, lads, to steal her heart, you need to get a signed T shirt by Mikey. Then she's yours quicker than a chicken is a foxes dinner.
-Create a cool nickname for yourself. Pretend that someone else thought of it so that it can make you seem more popular. Hers is Sumstar98- it's quite famous now. Be creative. Be original. The sky is no limit x
-Sumona's photo face. Don't ever change- the cool thing is to be predictable. Do a little bit of a squint and a pout, gets the lads every time. Seriously. I understand that this is a little bit contradictory to the last tip on how to be 'Sumstar cool' but that's the whole point. She is just a very enigmatic person. A walking paradox.
- Success at Mario Kart. Be the undeniable defeater of all those who cross your path. Be the formidable champion. Get up at 04:27am every morning just when the first bird sings and practice. Practice makes perfect, they say. What happens when you've already beaten perfection?
These are just a few tricks I've learnt and it's really boosted my ego- she has helped me fit in SO much better. I feel like a changed person- I laugh more, more boys fancy me and for that I have only one person to thank - Sumstar. For more observed tips on Sumona and how to be cool, stay tuned. This is just the bitesize version.
Lots of love,
I'm yours,
Chandelier Beyonce III
Here are a few tips and tricks that I have learnt during my close observation and study of this mysterious creature's behaviour and mannerisms:
- Poker face. ALL the time. Never give away the fact that when someone's talking you're actually plotting to kill them; that would be totally uncool and very not Sumona. Maintain the game face. Hate inwardly. It will all reveal itself eventually.
-HATE cats. Don't follow the trend of the 'Crazy Cat Lady' - it's totally Un-Sumstar. She hates them. Abhors them. You want to really be cool? Abolish the kitties.
-Have all the latest Bollywood tracks on your iPod. It's SO important to keep up to date on the latest singles to hit the taxi cabs so you're prepared on your mental nights out.
- Fan girl over Channing Tatum. Big time. And his neck that is the same circumference as a car tyre. So hot.
- Have toothbrushes in your kitchen. No- I'm being serious. The whole dental kit set right next to the bread and the cups, It's totally cool to do this. If you want to be Sumona.
- Casually have used ear buds at the top of the fridge. Adds to the element of surprise. Totally Sumstar cool.
- Linkin Park 4 EVER!"1!!!! OMG you don't even know. To truly capture the concept of being 'Sumstar Cool' you have got to fan girl over Minutes to Midnight. Also, lads, to steal her heart, you need to get a signed T shirt by Mikey. Then she's yours quicker than a chicken is a foxes dinner.
-Create a cool nickname for yourself. Pretend that someone else thought of it so that it can make you seem more popular. Hers is Sumstar98- it's quite famous now. Be creative. Be original. The sky is no limit x
-Sumona's photo face. Don't ever change- the cool thing is to be predictable. Do a little bit of a squint and a pout, gets the lads every time. Seriously. I understand that this is a little bit contradictory to the last tip on how to be 'Sumstar cool' but that's the whole point. She is just a very enigmatic person. A walking paradox.
- Success at Mario Kart. Be the undeniable defeater of all those who cross your path. Be the formidable champion. Get up at 04:27am every morning just when the first bird sings and practice. Practice makes perfect, they say. What happens when you've already beaten perfection?
These are just a few tricks I've learnt and it's really boosted my ego- she has helped me fit in SO much better. I feel like a changed person- I laugh more, more boys fancy me and for that I have only one person to thank - Sumstar. For more observed tips on Sumona and how to be cool, stay tuned. This is just the bitesize version.
Lots of love,
I'm yours,
Chandelier Beyonce III
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